Hi all, I know it has been a moment since I’ve been active on here, but I am currently reshaping my online presence. Here is an essay prompted by the Instagram page “@adviceforartists” https://www.instagram.com/adviceforartists/ , and I feel like it is a perfect entry to give you all a little insight into my life these days. I have finally come to a place within where I can spiritually and creatively be myself, and I love it. I look forward to writing much more!
A Day In the Life
For the past six weeks or so, my “day in the life” has evolved significantly. Six weeks ago, I was stuck in a routine of working a job that wasn’t fulfilling, and my life in general was causing me to lose sight of myself and what I want out of life. Therefore, I enrolled in a “Life Reset” course, a part of Alexis Haines’ Recovering from Reality business, in order to more clearly discover the life that I should be living for myself as it relates to the universe.
As life goes, right after I started the course, I was diagnosed with mono. At first, I was frustrated because I wanted to give the course my all, and I would have to use up my sick and vacation time at work in order to take a week off to try to recover. While that was going on, a romantic relationship also blew up in my face. The universe was certainly telling me that I need to take a step back and focus on myself.
Because I spent a pretty penny on the Life Reset course, I was determined to give it my all, especially given my circumstances at the time. I had a feeling that it was the answer to overcoming my feeling of feeling like I would never truly “belong” on this planet when it comes to any aspect of life. After a week and a half of taking the course and applying various tools given to us in the course, I immediately started to notice a change in myself and those around me.
One of the overall goals of the course is to allow one to transition from a subconscious way of living to a conscious way of living. Learning to be more conscious is not easy. It involves “reparenting” yourself, diving deep into your emotions and feelings, facing them, and overcoming them from a more logical and truthful standpoint. It’s about living in the “now”, loving you for all that you are, and living with a purpose.
Therefore, over the past six weeks, I have been reading a lot of useful books, utilizing Emotional Freedom Technique tapping, meditating, writing in a gratitude journal, future journaling, and taking care of my overall health much better than I was previously.
In terms of overall health, I have started exercising regularly again. I do my best to workout for 3 days in a row and then take 1 day off. Over the last year, I gained at least 50 lbs, and I got to the highest weight I have ever been in my life. I am still not down to my previous highest weight. However, that’s ok. This work has been about accepting the truth and taking each moment of each day to decide what I should do to best benefit me in that moment. If I want to sit down with a pint of ice cream, that’s ok. I am allowed to love every aspect of myself without uttering the words “I should” or “I need to.” It’s incredibly freeing to let go of such personally negative language, and it actually allows me to choose to pick up the ice cream less as it will benefit me more now and in the long run.
In addition to exercise, I have been taking vitamins and supplements daily that are also helping me to feel better than I have in years. For over 8 years, I took a multivitamin regularly. Well, after a breakup and other poor decisions last year, I decided I would rather spend the money for my “expensive” vitamins on alcohol. I know, destructive, but I had gotten to a point of wanting to escape reality instead of live in it. Now, I take those multivitamins, vitamin D, vitamin C, fish oil, MTC oil, and collagen peptides. If we weren’t in quarantine right now, I wouldn’t take as many every day, but I am doing my best to stay as strong as possible. Aside from COVID-19 floating around, my goal for my supplements and overall nutrition via food is to reduce brain inflammation.
One of the ways to get stuck living a subconscious, reactive, “childlike” state is by having too much inflammation in the brain. Inflammation causes the adult part of your brain, the prefrontal cortex, to shrink and not function to its full capacity. Therefore, the amygdala part of the brain, or the innate “fight or flight” part, takes over more often. The amygdala serves its purpose very well for moments of danger, but if you let it take over, it will start reading every interaction in your life as something to possibly read from a fight or flight standpoint. Every day, I do my best to take steps to more clearly and more frequently live from the prefrontal cortex.
Aside from my current nutrition and exercise regimen, I also do my best to write in a gratitude journal every day. I write down three things in my life (objects, people, places, etc.) and WHY I am grateful for them. The important part is writing down the reasoning behind being grateful for whatever it is. It truly puts what I don’t have in my life into perspective, because it allows me to focus on what I do have. If I future journal and do what I can now to work towards obtaining what I don’t have, I trust that what I want will eventually come to me. I just have to trust the universe and allow it to work on its own time while doing what I can and being appreciative for what I do have. Generally, this stage of my day happens right before I read before bed.
As I have only ventured out to the grocery store a couple of times since I’ve been in quarantine, my life has not been super eventful, but I am truly grateful for having every day for the next couple of weeks to focus on my new spiritual work of exercising my conscious. Of course, I have my days and moments where I watch tv for hours, but I accept and love that. I am not being lazy, but rather, I tell myself needed that time to relax and view a show. Perspective makes every day in the life of me a wonderful adventure.